One Step Further

Time pass so fast, its mid of may now, stil got another 1month then i will noe where i gonna to go.

Think back, what i done in these 5 month? I rili cant give the answer, cozs i felt tat i was wasted 5month, except work i was done ntg. Last week on Mother's Day, i used my 4month salary to buy my laptop (its my purpose of work), tat was what i got for 4month, ntg other than that.

At last i can put it down, it the good thing, cause u r friend to me nw, learned hw to put down d. Love is can't be forced =). I think i'm more suitable to be single.

Happy go lucky!!

Feel so stress these few day, cause i'm the only guy in my section, almost every things also will call me to do first, but i'm not superman!!

'Nick!' Someone calling, and 'Nick!', there calling too. My job not yet finish here then there will calling me, aizs..

I really hope this month can pass faster, not mean that i want to leave my colleague but just tired of it, i will miss u all also =)

These few day rili so down, why the world is so complicated? Why got money, love those things?

Love can be a sweet thing but for me it just make me suffer, that what i experienced, treat a ppl with my heart and i was so stupid think that when u care the people that u love and try to protect her and try help her to solve all the problem, she will feel that, but i'm wrong, this world don't have such simple and pure love. First they will see ur outlook, i definitely not handsome. Second money, i also not rich. Third carrier, I'm don't have any also. I understand that, cause i'm rili nothing.

Beside love, lets talk friends, I don't think i rili have some close friend, even one. I tried b4 treat someone as my best friend and share all my thing with her/he, but actually just i though it is but he/she didn't treat me as friend also, stupid rite? Whats the definition of friend, just for use only? If they didn't need u anymore then no need to bother u? I think it is, really tired of it, maybe from now i will only believe myself, as i know no friend will care for me and can say i have no friend, the real friend.

Live so long in this world but still can count as fail in my life, the one i love not love me at all, the friend that i trust actually not bother me. Let it be, i will be strong to be alone.

Today is second day i'm home alone, really feel lonely, sms to u, u didnt reply me, i didnt call u cozs i scare im the one disturb u, i noe i shud nt continue like this since i noe that im in ur heart jz a friend, forever wont change, and i not the one u looking for, dunno why sometime cant stop myself thinking of u!

Sometime i really hate alone at home, eat alone, watch tv alone. Sometime tired of work but no one i can share with, i dont have many friend, that why my friend call me lone ranger. Not i dunwan to communicate with other but its my natural attitude, i prefer not to talk than i offence the other cozs most of the time when i open my mouth, others like cant hear what i talk and keep talking with others, onli u will patiently listen to me and care for me, i think that the reason make me misunderstand.

Maybe one day or that day wont come, i just waiting, i will never give up.

As usual went MidValley and have my dinner there, have dinner at Teppanyaki, can't say it not nice but just normal, the pros is u can eat it freshly once it after cooked and u can watch they cook live.

After my dinner, we watch a fashion show there and the most funny thing at there is got a games organized to win the cash voucher and a Malay aunty bring her boy go up and decorate her boy with all girl stuff, sure get a lot of focus from the people and won rm500 cash voucher. Can't imagine rite? Guy with handbag and scalf also, OMG!!

Today i was thinking, human work so hard actually is for what? Just for luxury life?

Last time i though study so hard should be get what i want and i should happy with the result but i'm wrong, i'm not happy at all cause i really don't know why i should do all those thing. If really i have a good job and have luxury life, but live alone there is meaningless, i will feel lonely. If u say i can find a partner, ya i tried, and get hurt at the last, and i know i'm not the man of another one, so i choose to be alone, maybe sometime i will feel lonely but at least i won't get hurt.

Life is weird, people always say me well planning but the reality is think too much, make me can't do decision in my life and make me always change my mind. If u found out the way of life is, show me please..

1time, 2times and more, u say the different but u do the different things, is me not enuf understand u or that is the reality, u just lying me?

Think too much maybe, hope u can get the happiness that u want, hope u will happy with ur decision, i will pray for u.